Friends are moving looking for more

Added: Chakira Glines - Date: 09.09.2021 05:39 - Views: 33867 - Clicks: 7987

When the Jewish German psychologist Kurt Lewin fled Nazi rule and moved to the United States inhe, like many immigrants, found his new home a little puzzling.

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Especially when it came to friendships. American society was mobile in his day and has only gotten more mobile since. People can move from sea to shining sea, dropping things as they go. Gillath and Keefer did a series of small studies where people took questionnaires about their willingness to dispose of things and Friends are moving looking for more and their history of moving from place to place. Moving is a big life change, and not only with regard to place. Unless someone just moves across town, or to the next town over, the social circles they have easy access to are also likely to change, which, the researchers suspect, is the largest factor in why people might let some friends go.

Throughout the studies, they found no difference between romantic relationships and friendships as far as disposability, which is interesting and maybe reflective of friends being equally valued as ificant others. We can maintain them—we have the technology—but effort put toward long-distance phone calls and Facebooking is effort not put toward making new friends in the new place.

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And chances are, people will have many opportunities to make these assessments— one study that followed best-friend pairs for 19 years found that people moved an average of 5. The researchers acknowledge that the associations they found are only part of a complicated picture. For some, being extra mobile might make them lonely and might motivate them to put extra effort into their long-distance relationships.

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But they might put more effort into staying in touch with their best friends while they let some less-close friendships fall into remission. Perhaps this occasional tendency to keep friendships from getting too deep, and being willing to let them go, that Lewin characterizes as particularly American, comes not only from an easy-come, easy-go flippancy borne of mobility, but the knowledge of how hard it is to leave people. Popular Latest. The Atlantic Crossword. In Subscribe.

Friends are moving looking for more

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